I try very hard to be secure in myself yet insecurities seem to define my life.
I wish I knew why I was hard wired to feel inadequate when a man, who just complimented me or just flirted with me, flirts with another woman?
Why do I feel I have failed as a mother when I see other mothers calmly communicate with their children.
Is it me, or does society expect insecurities from women?
8 comments:
This morning I heard something that made me feel very...invisible and since then my day has gotten worse
i refer you back to your last post. self-doubt is normal. and why can't someone compliment you AND someone else. that doesn't make his compliments any less true. take the compliments as they come, you surely are deserving of each and every one.
*sigh*
Dear Lady:
It's not just women who have insecurities. I expect everyone does.
I know I do. I also know that I will have little control over my first thought, my first reaction to a situation. That gut reaction is the result of a lifetime of experiences and other people's expectations.
In other words, I am not responsible for my first thought--my first reaction. I expect it to be negative. It's what I was taught in many ways. Some subtle, others fairly blatant.
It's my second thought--my second reaction, that is the one I control.
And it's my job to get that second thought as close in time to the first one that I can override it, and remind myself of what I consider to be the truth of the situation--not just what I 'feel' at any one moment.
Remember this: feelings are only feelings. The are not real.
You may feel that you're a failure, but you are a success, as long as you give it your best effort.*
You may feel inadiquate, but you are enough.
You're doing fine.
And I agree with mimi. You can start your day over at any time. Just this morning I was just telling a very special, very dear friend exactly the same thing.
Yeharr
*and remember, your best effort also changes from day to day.
I don't know if it is necessarily society but maybe our environment in which we were raised or the activities of our life and the relationships we have encountered that shape us and our self esteem.
I want to know if there is ANYONE out there who does not suffer from insecurities? I personally have never known one.
All we can do is work on ourselves and our opinions of ourselves.
We can over analyze which only drives us more crazy or we can take one day at a time and learn to be stronger, better, adequate.
I struggle daily.
Many blessings to you!
i think we all, male and female, struggle with insecurities. it's just human nature. woman probably are just more open about them.
There is no doubt that women are more open about them. I have been very insecure all my life. It is one of the things about me I don't like. Then I find friends that are having the same issues about themselves and I feel a lot more normal.
Madame you have no idea how much I hope your day got better!
Mimi, perhaps society does not make one insecure but I do feel that they feed upon one's insecurities.
I am trying very hard to receive all compliments with graciousness and a Thank You.
Thank you!
Yes I know, Kristen.
Mr. Pirate you are so very wise.
I have reread your words over and over and I will try my best to listen to my second thoughts and try to let them override my first thoughts!
I am sure your friend appreciates and welcomes all your advie as much as I do.
Thank you, Blessed.
Ell, women are very sharing aren't they?
Hello Jon! You are welcome here among us, I hope you feel normal here.
Post a Comment